Seven True Lies?

UPDATE: The lie is revealed, and there is info about each true statement in the Comments. Thanks again for playing!

Randal tagged me with the Seven Deadly Lies meme, in which you tell seven lies about yourself. I remembered that I did something similar a couple of years ago - it was a meme called True Lies, in which you list four things about yourself, three of which are true, and one is a lie. People would try to guess which one was the lie.

I'm going to do the seven lies meme with a twist - I'll list seven things about myself, but only six of them are true. You guess which is the lie. Here goes:

1. I've been married three times.

2. I've had two house fires.

3. I've been in an earthquake.

4. I've been in a tornado.

5. I can't drive a stick shift.

6. I once met Pete Townshend.

7. I'm afraid of cows.

I tag Mandlebrot's Chaos, Seshat, and Pooks.

Drabble

Pooks tagged me with this one.

Write a drabble, which is a story containing exactly 100 words. It does not have to be a poem. (my word count includes the title)

This is about our new cat, named Shadow. Click here for a pic.


A Cat's Tale

I lived on the street
in summer's heat and winter's sleet.

I was sealed in an attic
by a local fanatic.

After a three-week fast
I was rescued at last

And given a home, so lovely, so nice
(except for the diet, which doesn't have mice.)

I've gained some weight 'round my middle.
I have my own place to piddle,

Plus a shelf at the window for sunning
and toys that are squeaky and cunning.

It's a big house to roam
with a bed of my own.

Say, life's pretty good
since I left the 'hood!


I tag John.

Splotchy's Viral Theater

Splotchy's instructions:

"This has probably been done before, but that is not stopping me, oh no.

Here's what I would like to do. I want to create a story that branches out in a variety of different, unexpected ways. I don't know how realistic it is, but that's what I'm aiming for. Hopefully, at least one thread of the story can make a decent number of hops before it dies out.

If you are one of the carriers of this story virus (i.e. you have been tagged and choose to contribute to it), you will have one responsibility, in addition to contributing your own piece of the story: you will have to tag at least one person that continues your story thread. So, say you tag five people. If four people decide to not participate, it's okay, as long as the fifth one does. And if all five participate, well that's five interesting threads the story spins off into.

Not a requirement, but something your readers would appreciate: to help people trace your own particular thread of the narrative, it will be helpful if you include links to the chapters preceding yours."

++++++

I woke up hungry. I pulled my bedroom curtain to the side and looked out on a hazy morning. I dragged myself into the kitchen, in search of something to eat. I reached for a jar of applesauce sitting next to the sink, and found it very cold to the touch. I opened the jar and realized it was frozen. (Splotchy)

I was used to the house being quite cold in the mornings, as the night log usually burns out around one AM when I am dreaming cozily under my covers, not normally waking to put a new one on until morning. I was surprised because on the rare occasions that it actually had reached sub-freezing temperatures in the house, I had awakened in the night to restart the fire. I would have been worried about the pipes before P-Day, but there hadn’t been running water in two years and that was one of the few advantages to being dependent on rainwater, no pipes. (Freida Bee)

Shivering, I moved through the cloud of my nearly-crystallizing breath over to the frost-encrusted window. Unable to see outside, I feebly attempted to brush the flakes away with my sleeve. I sighed, the warm exhalation upon the upper panes only further decreasing visibility. I thoughtlessly tried my fingernails, having forgotten that I continuously bite them when nervous. I've recently been nervous a lot. I didn't know why, and failed to give it a second thought. Shuffling across the well-worn wooden planks, strangely as cold as the jar, I opened a drawer to grab a spoon and begin the task at hand, chipping away at the frost. After some moments, I stopped to peek outside, managing to see only white. The window was again frozen.

There's no way it can be that cold, I thought to myself. I began to chip once more, with the same result. Frustrated, I sprinted the ten feet back to the drawer, taking a larger soup spoon and returned to my assault on the ice. Harder and harder I pushed the spoon into the wintry glaze, intermittently stopping to wipe the chill sweat from my brow, pushing harder, my arms flailing upwards, now coming down as if wielding an axe, ignoring the stinging salt of perspiration in my eyes, the ice growing along with my anger, overcome by a violence, a berserker rage, up and down I swung that makeshift blade into the white, into the red, grunting, screaming, my hands sliced open as the spoon blasted through the broken glass.

I didn't see anything but the dew-haunted lawn before I slumped down, fainting on the cold wooden floor. (Randal Graves)

I awoke to the touch of my cat, Scheiser, as he gently licked my cold cheek. His rough tongue against my cold, sensitive skin jolted me like electricity, popping my eyes wide open.

"Hey fella," I mumbled, propping myself up on one elbow. Scheiser purred in my ear, and I scratched his forehead with numb fingers.

I noticed the window was still encrusted with ice... if anything, it had thickened while I was out. I got myself onto all fours, then pulled myself up on the old couch. This was nuts. The lawn outside had been dew-laden, yet things were frozen in here.

Scheiser was at the kitchen door, meowing to be let out. Why not, I thought. Better to have him do his wretched business outside than in. Feeling sluggish, I shuffled to the door, unlocked it and opened it. Cool morning air filled my nostrils as I looked out on the front "yard"... not a speck of ice anywhere to be seen in the dirt and weeds. It actually seemed kind of balmy. I followed Scheiser outside into the day. (Snave)

"Scheiser," I said, "I don't think we're in Kansas anymore."

"Nyerh," spoke Scheiser, rubbing against my legs.

I looked down and saw a drop of crimson on his glossy black fur. Blood was dripping from my hands. Another drop hit the cat, this time on his head, right between his ears. His whole body flinched in that way cats have of telling you that you are finished petting them, for now. He stalked off, flicking his tail, while I stared dumbly at my hands.

It was as if my brain had also frozen inside the house, and was just now beginning to thaw, because I suddenly remembered my insane attack on a defenseless jar of applesauce. I really must do something about my OCD, I thought, as I followed the blood splatters back to the kitchen.

The cold assaulted me as soon as I opened the door. I propped it open, sliding the antique iron doorstop over with one blood-splashed slipper. My teeth chattered, my breath sending frosty puffs ahead of me as I picked my way around the shattered glass. At the hall, I flipped the lightswitch with my elbow, not wanting to bloody the wall, but no light came on.

I trudged down the dark hallway to the bathroom. I grabbed a towel and wiped my hands. Despite all the blood, my hands weren't painful. They were numb with cold, but surely, I thought, not enough to anesthetize them? The bathroom window was frosted solid, but at least I had enough light to rummage for bandages in the deep wall cabinet.

Sha-whop! The walls rattled. I froze. I knew that sound. It was the slam of the kitchen door.

+++
Let's see ... I tag Pooks and Dan.

Ten random things about me

I was tagged by Randal at L'Ennui Melodieux.

1. I'm in my tenth year of menopause.

2. Tomcat is still living, and still loves me.

3. I am married to a saint.


4. I was raised by a violent paranoid.

5. So I tend to see dangers everywhere (they call this "hypervigilance").

6. I'm definitely in the "glass is half empty" camp.

7. In elementary school, they played "Safety Lady" tips over the speakers every morning. While all the other kids were talking, laughing, and generally having fun, I was straining to hear every single fucking word the Safety Lady said (just as I listened to the paranoid who raised me - oh, and I became expert at interpreting body language, too - very important to survival.)

8. In fact, in psychology, people like me are called "Survivors."



9. The more I learn about Singularity, the more I'm convinced that sentient biologicals most certainly have, and will, elect to become nonbiological beings. (See also The Singularity Institute.)

10. Which is why I sometimes wonder if we sentient biologicals are part of an ancestor simulation program conducted by the nonbiological beings our species will become. (Not that I'm paranoid, mind you.)

Bonus: 11. This is a pic of my virtual self and Lavender Dawn (in black) on her virtual pirate ship.



Hm, it may be that most folks have already been tagged with this one. Let's see ... Pooks? You're tagged. And um, Lavender!
_____________________________

The Pharyngula Mutating Genre Meme

The Pharyngula Mutating Genre Meme

The OCD Gen X Liberal tagged me.

I got tagged with this cool meme, demonstrating evolution in cyberspace:

There are a set of questions below that are all of the form, "The best [subgenre] [medium] in [genre] is...".

Copy the questions, and before answering them, you may modify them in a limited way, carrying out no more than two of these operations:

* You can leave them exactly as is.

* You can delete any one question.

* You can mutate either the genre, medium, or subgenre of any one question. For instance, you could change "The best time travel novel in SF/Fantasy is..." to "The best time travel novel in Westerns is...", or "The best time travel movie in SF/Fantasy is...", or "The best romance novel in SF/Fantasy is...".

* You can add a completely new question of your choice to the end of the list, as long as it is still in the form "The best [subgenre] [medium] in [genre] is...".

* You must have at least one question in your set, or you've gone extinct, and you must be able to answer it yourself, or you're not viable.

Then answer your possibly mutant set of questions. Please do include a link back to the blog you got them from, to simplify tracing the ancestry, and include these instructions.

Finally, pass it along to any number of your fellow bloggers. Remember, though, your success as a Darwinian replicator is going to be measured by the propagation of your variants, which is going to be a function of both the interest your well-honed questions generate and the number of successful attempts at reproducing them.

My great-great-great-great-great-great-grandparent is Pharyngula.
My great-great-great-great-great-grandparent is Metamagician and the Hellfire Clubs
My great-great-great--great-grandparent is Flying Trilobite.
My great-great-great-grandparent is A Blog Around the Clock.
My great-great-grandparent is Shakespeare's Sister.
My great-grandparent is Shayera.
My grandparent is PoliShifter
My parent is The OCD Gen X Liberal


1. The best time travel film in SF/Fantasy is:

The Rocky Horror Picture Show

2. The best scary movie(s) in scientific dystopias is:

Nineteen Eighty-Four (1984)


3. The best (cult?) novel in teenage angst is:

Carrie

4. The best stand-up comedian in American comedy is:

George Carlin

5. The best politician is:

LBJ

6. The best sexy movie in American film is:

Nine 1/2 Weeks


Let not let this lineage go extinct! I am asking the following to go forth and multiply:

Puppet Show

L'ennui-Melodieux

Modern Science

The Friendly Atheist

-----------------------------------------------------------

It's a meme

***
1. We HAVe to post these RUles beFORE we give you the facts.

2. PlAYers start with eight RANdom facts/HAbits about thEMSElves.

3. PEople who are tagGED need to write on their own blog about their eight things and post these RUles.

4. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagGED and list their names.

Don’t forget to leave them a COmment telling them they’re tagGED, and to read your blog.
***

Here are eight random facts about me:

1. I like skim milk.

2. In addition to loving handbag porn, I have an earring fetish.

3. Ooh! Speaking of fetishes, I love to - um, nevermind *blush.

4. I have a terrible sense of direction. Hopeless, really.

5. Which is just as well, because I have driving phobias.

6. When I read Lizzy's answers to this meme, I realized that I also have GAD because I "awfulize." Oh man, give me a made-for-TV disaster movie, or a CNN Special on SARS, and I'm there, taking notes.

7. And indexing them. The notes. I'm very organized.

8. Sometimes. That's very puzzling to me. Sometimes I'm organized, other times ... a total slob. Huh. There's probably a named disorder for that, too.

Okay, I tag:

Tomcat
Pooks
Iain
Michelle
Mary
Theresa
John
Dan
Cynthia

Interview Meme

This one's from Lavender:

1. What is your biggest pet peeve and why does it bother you?

Tailgaters. Why do they assume they have the right to invade my space? I did a post about this here.

2. Why do you want to move away from Texas?

It's not so much wanting to leave Texas (except to get away from the blasted heat!), but wanting to go the same state where Tomcat's parents retired. We've been to North Carolina and it's gorgeous. It has two coasts, forests, and mountains, all in one easy-to-drive-to area, unlike Texas, where you have to drive forever to get to something. Oh, and did I mention the heat?

3. Name three things that you DO NOT believe in.

One: Magical beings like gods and goddesses, elves, and Santa Claus

Two: The so-called "nobility of man." Sure, there are exceptions, but that's the point. Noble people seem to be aberrations, because judging by the way most people on the planet are living, in abject poverty, and some under horrific conditions, the rest of the species sure doesn't have much going for it.

Three: Anything the Bush administration says.

4. When did you first realize that you wanted to be a writer?

Somewhere in childhood, maybe around age 10 or 11. I started writing short stories. Sure wish I'd saved them!

5. What are you most afraid of?

Alzheimers.

DIRECTIONS FOR THE INTERVIEW MEME

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Five Things

Pooks tagged me with this meme. It's called:

Five things you don't know about me and probably don't care to know about me.

(These are things most people in my tiny part of the Blogosphere don't know about me, although real-life friends and family probably do.)

1. My childhood was ... exciting. Mom was a multiple personality, Dad was an alcoholic. Both were abusive. Off and on, I've spent decades in therapy and have been hospitalized more than once for severe depression.

2. I have familial hypercholesterolemia, an inherited disease that causes extremely high cholesterol levels. When I was 30, I had to have my abdominal aorta and femoral arteries replaced. I was lucky it didn't affect my heart. My brother wasn't so lucky. He had a quadruple bypass at 40, and died at 49. He never smoked, and he exercised regularly. I take 80 mgs. of Lipitor a day.

3. I have joined neither the Democratic nor Republican parties, but think of myself as an Independent. (In Texas, you don't have to register with a party.) The last Republican I voted for, in a Presidential race, was Nixon. In the last elections, I voted straight-ticket Democratic for the first time. Apparently, a lot of people did!

4. For some women, it's shoes. For me, it's handbags, although I've never paid more than $60 for one in my life. Not that I wouldn't want to! I just can't justify it, no matter how hard I try. Hm. The $1,200 Versace, or groceries and a car payment? But, that doesn't stop me from indulging in a little online handbag porn from time to time.

5. I get silly happy over some of the most mundane things - a quiet evening at home with Tomcat is bliss, cooking a meal for friends is fun, gardening on a nice day is heaven. Oh - and blogging. :)

Your Life is Better Than 59% of All People

Your life is pretty average, with lots of normal ups and downs. You're on the way to having a better life, as long as you focus on what's really important. Remember to take the time to do the things that you like best, and let the little things slide. No one on their deathbed ever wished that they spent more time worrying or complaining!

How Does Your Life Compare?

Scruffybutt in Raincoat Tags Katycat's Bleen

... or something like that. I hate coming up with titles for my posts, which is why I've been experimenting with omitting the dang things lately. Read on, and the title becomes clear, I think:

First, Cynthia suggested that Scruffybutt needs a raincoat. I looked for one online because I haven't run across any in the stores. Here's one that will look great on her (Scruffybutt, not Cynthia):





This is from DoggieVogue. I'll order the pink one, of course. For some reason, people always think Scruffybutt is a male. That's why I stopped buying generic-looking sweaters and started putting her in little girly-looking things. Some people still refer to her as a "he." When her groomer did that, I should have given up, I guess.

Next, Pooks tagged me for a book meme. Here it is

You do this:

1) Find the nearest book
2) Open to page 123
3) Type lines 6-8 of said book
4) Tag three others

So here goes:

" ... things as the bar codes used in food stores. Yeah, no kidding! They really are that nuts, and they are armed and extremely dangerous."

from Baubles of Blasphemy
by Edwin F. Kagin

I tag Cynthia, Garnie, and Dawn.

Thirdly, Katycat ran through here chasing another bleen while I was trying to come up with a title for this post. Hey, whatever works.

In A Funk

Blick. I'm in a funk. Writer's block. Blogging block. Constipated with words. Or full of it, you might say. Ew. See? Terrible analogy.

Knowing I need to write. Staring at the keyboard. Which produced this profundity:

Thank goodness for keyboards; otherwise, we'd have to operate our 'puters with
our bare hands.

How sad is that?

This is how sad - I am the Tagee of an alphabet meme, and I am going to answer it right here, right now. You were warned.

A- Available or single? And so, it's come to this.

B- Best Friend? Tomcat, who is also the love of my life.

C- Cake or pie? Cake. Icing optional.

D- Drink of choice? Coffee. Hot and black (no, that's not a reference to how I like my men.)

E- Essential item I use every day. Fork.

F- Favorite color: Red.

G- Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms? Ick.

H- Hometown? Wherever my home is. I was born in Smalltown, Texas, but haven't been there since the age of one.

I- Indulgence: Half-Price Book Store.

J- January or February? Yes. (WTF?)

K- Kids and names: Scruffybutt and Katycat.

L- Life is incomplete without? Music.

M- Marriage date: I always date before marriage.

N- Number of siblings: Two.

O- Oranges or apples? Yes, but for comparison purposes only.

P- Phobias or fears? Both.

Q- Favorite quote?: For every action, there's an overreaction (from Maxwell, my ex, and the subtitle of my WIP, Gino's Law.)

R- Reasons to smile: Hoss' b**g, CuteOverload.

S- Season: Tarragon's my favorite.

T- Tag 3 or 4 people. I'll tag one. Dan Rockstar is so due.

U- Unknown fact about me: I can rewrite a dream while I'm dreaming. Do other people do that, too?

V- Vegetable you don’t like: Beets, but it's not personal.

W- Worst habit: Starting a blog and then not keeping up with it.

X- X-Rays: They're why I don't go swimming in the ocean.

Y- Your favorite food? The ones with large amounts of cholesterol.

Z- Zodiac sign? Aquarius.

A Book Meme

The Duke of Earle at Romantic Ramblings tagged me for a book meme. Great - I love memes, especially about books.

1) One book that changed your life:

Simple Abundance by Sarah Ban Breathnacht. A book of daily readings that helped me appreciate and live life in the moment.

2) One book that you’d read more than once:

The six original Dune books by Frank Herbert.

3) One book you’d want on a deserted island:

My current manuscript. Oh, and some blank Moleskines and a pen.

4) One book that made you laugh:

Skinny Legs And All by Tom Robbins. Deep and profoundly funny.

5) One book that made you cry:

The Sparrow (and The Children of God, its sequel) by Mary Doria Russell. Emilio Sandoz is a character that will be in my heart forever. It's outrageous that they've picked Brad Pitt to play him in the movie, and plan to change Sandoz' ethnicity to Australian so he can play the part. This is so wrong. Johnny Depp would be a magnificent Emilio (so would a younger Al Pacino.) The Sparrow is about mankind's first contact with an alien civilization. While the United Nations tries to figure out the best way to approach them, the Jesuits quietly fund an expedition. Listen to this from the book: "The Jesuit scientists went to learn, not to proselytize. They went so that they might come to know and love God's other children. They went for the reason Jesuits have always gone to the furthest frontiers of human exploration. They went ad majorem Dei gloriam: for the greater glory of God. They meant no harm." Russell grabs you with that intriguing statement, doesn't she? "They meant no harm."

6) One book you wish you’d written:

Watership Down, by Richard Adams. A stunning masterpiece. Besides, I adore rabbits.

7) One book you wish had never been written:

I was tempted to say the Koran because of the fanaticism it seems to have inspired, but then, one could say the same about the Bible. Of course, books don't cause evil, people do. I can't seriously say that I wish certain books had never been written. Okay, maybe I could say anything by Ann Coulter, mostly because of the pitiful waste of trees.

8) One book you're currently reading:

This is terrible because I'm not reading anything at the moment! Usually I have two or three books going. The last two fiction books I've read were A Breath of Snow and Ashes by Diana Gabaldon (the fifth or sixth in her Outlander series) and Hunters of Dune, the latest in the Dune series written by Frank Herbert's son.

9) One book you've been meaning to read:

Enough: The Phony Leaders, Dead-End Movements, and Culture of Failure That Are Undermining Black America--and What We Can Do About It, by Juan Williams.

10) Tag five people:

Pooks, Pandora, Lavender Dawn, Garnie, Cynthia.

Sayin It

Here's a long overdue response to a meme I was tagged with by Cynthia over at Coyote Underground (with apologies for lateness!). Cynthia came up with this one herself, which is based on a character she created who always came bursting into a scene saying exactly what was on her mind, without self-censorship.

Q. What would you say, that you would ordinarily NEVER say, but if you knew you could get away with it, what would you say? And to whom.

A. "The closer you get, the slower you go, you fucking nitwit." (To tailgaters.)

If I'm in the fast lane, I'll move out of the way, which is what you're supposed to do, anyway. But if I'm in the middle or the slow lane, and I'm going WITH the flow of traffic, then get off my ass already! But I would never say that, or give them the finger, for fear of being the victim of road rage. Instead, I gradually slow down while muttering the above, and counting the seconds to see how long it takes for that to sink into the nitwit's brain. (Oh, how passive aggressive of me!)

It's All About Me

I swiped this from Garnie. It's called a Johari* window, or grid. I've selected a few words from the grid which I think describe me. Now, I'm asking you to select five or six words that YOU think describe me.

You can click here to see the grid. Click on the words you want to select for me.

Then, at the bottom, enter YOUR name so that I'll know who picked what (or, I guess you could enter "Anonymous" if you'd prefer.) The responses I get will be compared to my own list of words.

After you have entered the words you've selected for me, you'll get a screen where you can see my own list. You'll also see the words that other people have selected, but not their names.


THEN, you'll get to do your OWN grid if you want, and then it will be All About You!

----------------------------
* From Wikipedia:

A Johari window is a metaphorical tool intended to help people better understand their interpersonal communication and relationships. It is used primarily in self-help groups and corporate settings as a heuristic device to encourage people to open up to another in self-disclosure. The concept was invented by Joseph Luft and Harrington Ingram, who combined their first names to create the name of the tool.

----------------------------
Heuristic is the art and science of discovery and invention.

Some commonplace heuristics, all from How to Solve It:

If you are having difficulty understanding a problem, try drawing a picture.

If you can't find a solution, try assuming that you have a solution and seeing what you can derive from that ("working backward").

If the problem is abstract, try examining a concrete example.

Try solving a more general problem first (the "inventor's paradox": the more ambitious plan may have more chances of success).

------------------------------
Thanks!!
--Candace a/k/a Chenoah

Tagged

Got this one over at Dawn-Marie's Dreamscape:
(I'm guessing it's called the "Four Things" meme.)

Four jobs you've had in your life
Interviewing customers at the new-fangled "fast-food" restaurant, McDonald's
Astrologer
Legal secretary
Domestic goddess (current job)

Four movies you could watch over and over (and I have)
Princess Bride
Planes, Trains, and Automobiles
Bram Stoker's Dracula
Dune

Four places you've lived
Japan
Ft. Hood, TX
Ft. Worth, TX
Dallas, TX

Four tv shows you love to watch
Book of Daniel (until the wimps at NBC cancel it)
24
Boston Legal
West Wing (until the wimps at NCB cancel it)

Four places you've been on vacation
Corpus Christi, TX
Ixtapa, Mexico
North Carolina
London

Four blogs you visit daily
Oh dear. I'm afraid I don't always visit
any blog on my blogroll daily. I'll do
better, I promise!

Four of your favorite foods
Bacon, eggs, and toast
Shrimp scampi
Blue Bell vanilla ice cream
Coffee (well, it comes from beans, doesn't it?)

Four places you'd rather be
(All together now:)
NORTH CAROLINA!!!

Four authors you can't live without
Frank Herbert
Brian Herbert, Kevin J. Anderson
Diana Gabaldon
Ann Rule

Four vehicles you've owned
Can I change this one? Thanks.

Four people I most admire
Tomcat
Bishop Gene Robinson
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Dr. Stephen Hawking

Haven't been tagged with this one yet?
You're It!

Oh Goody - A Book Meme!

Steve : Numen tagged me for a book meme. The meme asks for a personal list of 15 things about … books.


1. My parents delighted in telling us to "look it up" whenever we had questions like, what are clouds made of, how far is it to the Moon, or why do bugs have brown blood instead of red? This was way before computers were invented. We had a set of enclyclopedia and a set of Wonder Books. I loved, loved, loved browsing through those things! My folks did a lot of things wrong, but this instilling a love of books and knowledge was way right!

2. Our cars can drive us to Half Price Books without our assistance. In fact, for ages our big Saturday night hot date has been to have dinner at our favorite pizza place, then go to Half Price, then Sonic for chocolate shakes. Ah, married life!

3. When Tomcat and I got married and moved into our house, we culled through our combined book collection and boxed up the duplicates. Twenty-six boxes of duplicates. Which we took to Half Price. That was almost twenty years ago.

4. Twenty years of continued collecting later, there is no longer any room for books in our house. Seriously. But that didn't stop me from sending my Amazon Wishlist to friends this season.

5. We cannot possibly pay to move all of these books to North Carolina with us when we go. That would be insane. Wouldn't it?

6. I collect old, old recipe and housekeeping books, the kind where the section on poultry begins, "Do not feed the birds the day before slaughter." Recipies were called "receipts." I love that. And just reading about everything they had to do to clean the house is exhausting, which explains the state of my own house. When I get home with one of these books, I will read it cover to cover as if it were the lastest Harry Potter. I do not know what is up with that.

7. My favorite love story of all time is Jane Eyre. Sigh. Oh hell no -- swoon is more like it!

8. Tom Robbins' Skinny Legs and All is both the funniest and most spiritually profound book I've ever read.

9. Two more favorites: Mary Doria Russell's The Sparrow, and its sequel, The Children of God. Wow. I've blogged about these before on my old blog. I even wrote to the author (I've never done that before.) IMHO, the sequel IS the story, and The Sparrow is just the prequel to it. But that's not what I wrote the author about. The Sparrow is going to be made into a movie, but not for several more years because of various contractual commitments of the parties involved. But I'm not too disappointed with having to wait until 2010 for the movie. That's because I am dreading the movie. You see, they picked Brad Pitt to play the lead role of Emilio Sandoz. This is deeply wrong. I wanted Johnny Depp. The author said, "Oh dear God yes, Johnny Depp." But, it is not to be. My mother-in-law says Al Pacino. I say yes, yes, Al Pacino, but a YOUNG Al Pacino. But, it is not to be. They picked Brad Pitt to play this wonderfully complex human being, Emilio Sandoz. Apparently, they are even thinking of changing the character's ethnicity. I cannot stand it.

10. Although The Sparrow and The Children of God are technically science fiction, I don't classify them as such in the Dewey decimal system of my mental library. So, my all-time favorite sci-fi is Dune -- Dune and all of its sequels, its posthumous prequels and coming sequels. What a universe! What a stupendous mind that created it! I've lost count of how many times I've read these. There are many levels to this work, as Frank Herbert Himself said. No matter how many times I go back, I'm never bored. This is odd, because I must have started the first book, Dune, two or three times and just couldn't get into it. But, once I got past the first, oh, 50 pages or so, I was hooked for life. My favorite of Herbert's in the series is God Emperor of Dune. My favorite of the prequels written by Herbert's son and a co-author, is The Machine Crusade.

l1. Another thing I collect is books on British Royalty. But not the current Royals. Quel bore! No, I started out with the Tudors (now that was a dysfunctional family!), then studied the Regency period, then the Victorian. That's when I fell in love with Albert. Albert was the best king the British never had. Or something like that. Maybe I'll do the Plantagenets next.

12. I used to read a lot of John Grisham, until I realized I was reading the same story over and over. Ditto Dean Koontz.

13. I have tons of books on crafting. I also have detailed indices of projects that looked like fun in craft magazines. It is impossible to live long enough to try even a tenth of these projects.

14. I have an extensive collection of astrology books. I even have ephemerides from the days before astrology software programs.

15, Oh no! I'm already at number 15? Obviously, I could go ON and ON about books! Okay, here's something I'd like to add about books: I've written one, and started another. The first one, The Earthquake Doll, is an historical novel for Young Adults set in post-war Japan. It is in its third rewrite. After the first of the year I'll be sending out query letters to literary agents. Wish me luck! And the second one? Well, I'm still kinda waiting for the plot to get here.

Okay, now I'll tag ... Duke of Earle at Romantic Ramblings, and because she loves books SO MUCH, Michele.

At Last!

!!! It must be your lucky day!  At last - answers to my previous post, "True Lies?" !!!

"I was a professional astrologer for two years."

TRUE!  And I worked my kiester off because that was way back before they had computer programs that would calculate charts and spit out transits and progressions in nanoseconds.

*****

"I was once the only passenger on a commercial airline flight."

TRUE!  Hah!  Most everyone thought this one was the lie.  Back in, oh ... 1971-ish, I took a Continental Airlines flight from Dallas to Sante Fe, New Mexico.  At the airport in Midland, Texas, every passenger but me got off the plane, so there I was, the only passenger when we continued on to Santa Fe.  When the stewardess found out this was the first time I had ever flown, she told the pilot and co-pilot, and they invited me up into the cockpit.  Way cool.  When we landed, I stepped out onto the tarmac to behold the Santa Fe International Airport in all of its ADOBE glory!

*****

"I was once hit in the face by a Frisbee at a Stones' concert."

TRUE!  Alas.  The concert was in Dallas at the Cottonbowl.  It was ... 1981? maybe.  Why do people throw Frisbees at concerts?  Good thing I was stoned at the time, because that might have hurt really bad!

*****

"I once met Robert Blake."

FALSE!   Thank God!  Way back before I ever met Tomcat, I really, really had a huge crush on Robert Blake.  I mean, I wanted to MARRY Robert Blake!  Oh, people -- be careful what you wish for -- just ask Bonnie Lee Bakley.  Oh, wait, you can't.  Nevermind. 

And kudus to Pooks at GuiltyofBeing for guessing this one!

 

True Lies?

I saw this over at OldOldLadyoftheHills, who borrowed it from Colleen, so I'm shamelessly borrowing it, too. (Actually, I think I've seen this a long time ago, but ... the way my memory is ... maybe not). Please do check out these ladies' blogs! I guarantee you will be entertained. I "discovered" them through Michele, our lovely "topless blogger." Well, she USED to be topless, back when she had the picture of just the lower half of a woman on her blog. That was months ago when I had my old blog. Now that I'm back, the pic is gone and there are ALL KINDS OF NEW bloggers posting there! So, lots of folks to meet and greet.

Anyway, here goes (and feel free to use this bit on your own blog).

I list four things about myself. Three are true. One is a lie. You try to guess which is the lie. Results revealed in my next post. (No, there is absolutely no point to this.)

1. I was a professional astrologer for two years.

2. I was once the only passenger on a commercial airlines flight.

3. I was hit in the face by a frisbee at a Stones' concert.

4. I once met Robert Blake.

Hoss Tagged Me

Hoss tagged me - Yay!

He says: "Candy: Here's a double meme:

What were you doing 10 years ago?
What were you doing one year ago?
What are 5 things you enjoy doing?
What are your 5 bad habits?
What 5 things do you find yourself saying a lot?

That should keep you busy for awhile."

1. Ten years ago: I really don't remember. I'll ask Tomcat to look back in his journals and maybe something will jog my memory. This is yet another instance where I'll have to say, "Yes, honey, you're right; I should keep a journal. You never know when Hoss will tag you." The keyword here is "keep." I'm very good at starting journals. I just don't keep up with them.

2. One year ago: Enjoying the Midnight CANDLELIT Christmas service at our new church, The Fig. Candlelight at Midnight was (one) issue at our old church.

3. Five things I enjoy doing: (1) reading Hoss's blog (oops, sorry Hoss -- Hoss's b**g); (2) moving to North Carolina (well, I'm sure I will if I ever get Maxwell House sold...); (3) surfing the "internets" :) (4) making fun of Dubya (well hell, it's not like it's difficult or anything...); (5) browsing book stores. Hey, life in the fast lane, huh?

4. Five bad habits: (1) Sloth. Definitely sloth. (2) Procrastination. (3) and (4) Repeating myself; (5) Cursing.

5. Five things I say a lot: (1) "Shit" tops the list, unfortunately. (2) "That's my Schmoopie" to Tomcat (I know, gak.... but that's what we say); (3) "I'm cold!" (4) "I'm hot!" (5) "I wanna move to North Caroliiiiiinaaaaaa...!"

Hoss didn't say how many people I'm supposed to tag with the meme. I'll pick five, since five seems to be the theme of this one. Let's see, I tag ...

Creta at Sew Crazy
Dan at PuppetShow
Garnie
Margalit at What Was I Thinking?
Pooks at Guilty of Being

(Please forgive if any of you got this meme before -- I've been away for a while).

I look forward to your answers!!!

It's Been So Long

SOMEBODY MEME ME!

please?